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“Seemingly any pitch that we mislocate, they have not missed in the two �������t¶�� so far,” Farrell said.

"When I get hit hard, I mislocate pitches or the ball's up in the zone and that's what happened," Marcum said.

All papers have splashed on this "story" – so we feel obliged to bring it to you – but the Mill is pretty sure that if there's one thing we can all agree on, it's that the day Arsenal mislocate their bottle is the day that gossip and tittle-tattle reach their terrible, screaming endgame.